January of Marjolaine part 1
I don’t know where to start. I do remember that evening. I was in fourth year of high school and I was facing my huge computer screen. Searching for criteria of what it takes to become a surgeon or a doctor or any kind with a high level of education. My best friend in the world had just told me that she couldn’t picture me doing a Master or a PHD. I felt insulted. I took it as a dare. Was she more brilliant or something? How could she say that? I was so mad. I was worth it enough to do it.
Of course, she just meant it in a way that I was too bubbly and dreamy for that. Too artistic. Too weird. Too all over the place. But that is why she loved me! I was her crazy friend always full of ideas. She didn’t mean it as rude. But I got mad.
In that time, I was one of the best in my class. I was studying the highest level of math and I was spending most of my lunch time at the orientation service. Doing test, talking to that woman, trying to find my profession. We soon had to decide our options for the last year. Would I do chemistry, physics? Or would I take more art classes?
I will be an international Makeup-Artist, I will become a highly-known investigator, I will be a doctor, I will be a politic influencer at the ONU, I will be an actress, I will be a veterinarian. Were some of my daily new idea and job.
‘’No, I’m serious I am sure this time.’’ Believed none of my friend, ever
All the doors were open. I was smart. It made the choice even harder. But life happened as always and things fell into place. Well I forced them too. Because at one point you must make a choice. Right?
Common, just pick something
And so, I did. I didn’t choose chemistry and physics. I went in Human Sciences in College. I saw my cousin choosing her profession and it seemed cool enough. I’d have a well seen job, a great 9-5, I’d feel useful to society, I would have a purpose and live in Quebec City.
I was set. I would become a Speech Language Pathologist
College was done. Bachelor in Psychology with high grades, 200 required implication and sufficient volunteering experiences were on their way. Doubts were arising and as I was so excited by all my other activities, yoga, cooking and writing, I realized something was off. But I still can’t believe I blinded myself so long to fit in.
-”Dad, I will follow my 200 hours Yoga Teacher Training and use my student loan to pay, ok?
-”Common, don’t do that to me… but as soon as you keep it as a hobby, right?”
-”Sure, sure, I will still be a Speak and Language Pathologist. ”
Falalallaalllaapahalaalallapa (Fast forwarding sound of travelling through space and time)!
I became a Yoga Teacher, I moved for a full year abroad in Germany to finish my Bachelor, traveled for more than 90 days, met the man of my dream, finished my bachelor, went back to Canada to sell everything I owned (goodbye blue Hyundai Accent) and moved to Berlin to find a flat with my lovely Greek-German man.
5 month have passed already since I moved here. I stopped my studies after my bachelor. No master in plan. I am trying to become a full-time artist. Sending hundreds of CV’s to find a way to pay my rent, making my way as a Yoga Teacher, committing on my blog, doing casting as an extra in commercials, finding a full-time job, being exhausted, turning it into a part time job, finding my music identity and thinking about building my own business.
My best friend knew all along. I knew too. But it took me a while to allow myself to be myself.
I’m making my way up. January was the first time since I arrived in Berlin that things started moving fast and my plan aligned to finally make sense. I guess all my passions found a way to be friends.
‘’Common, you can’t focus on 4 things and be successful at all of them’’! I heard more than once
Well, I don’t care anymore. YEAH! I’m having fun and it’s a great journey. Want to know what happened in January? Part two will be up on Monday at 18h00.
I’m becoming an artist woup woup!
Have a nice weekend Flighters!